3/27/2007 Wednesday

Dear All,

Tomorrow is Qualification Day, which is the beginning of the end of Basic Training. Why? Well, because we will at this point have learned to march and shoot. Many other things as well, of course, but these are the basic fundamentals of warfare. Move to where you need to be and then kill things when you get there. Basic? Yes. But this is Basic training.

Also because we only have 3 weeks left. There will be two notable field exercises, a tower scaling, and an APFT final before we go. Not that much. And the last week is apparently spent cleaning and recovering without much training, so it really means that we’re looking at our last two weeks of training.

To signify this shift, we spent the day back at Reception drawing our Class A uniforms. These are our dress uniforms used for Graduation. Once you’ve made it this far they’re pretty sure you’re going to make it through. These thins are expensive, after all. So I’ve got them hanging in my locker now. Berets and all. So look out, ladies, because Lyon’s out and on the prowl in his sexy BCGs and grandpa pants. The ones that rest at your belly-button. The Army has resolved to spend thousands of dollars to make me look as much like Steve Urkel as possible. But hey, it’s their money. For an E-4 salary, I’ll let them dress me however they want. I’m just going to ask Hope to shield her eyes when I’m around.

It was fascinating to return to Reception after a month and half of BCT. I noticed things instantly that I never noticed before. All the new recruits, for instance, wear their patrol caps incorrectly. Look like idiots. The halls are filthy and desperately need a thorough cleaning. I wonder if this is how I’ll be at home: dress-right dressing all the chairs, covering down all the dinner plates, taking a toothbrush to the corners of the kitchen…what a difference a month can make.

The funniest thing just happened during accountability formation—yes, I have opt write these letters in shifts. Background: there are 3 platoons in Bravo Co. 2^nd, 3^rd, and 4^th; where’s 1^st? Who knows. They just don’t exist this cycle. Anyway, the DSs of each platoon foster a somewhat-friendly rivalry between us, with the coveted “Honour Platoon” graduation award as the prize. We can get pretty heated about our platoon rivalries, too. Before chow, for instance, we shout out cadences customized for our platoons and DSs. Around Week 4 these cadences became cracks at other platoons. The platoon motto for Plt 2 was “Keep on Running.” And eventually Plt 4 would respond to it in unison with their own shout of “You’d better run!” One day, as I think I’ve already told, we responded to a Plt 2 taunt by having our formation left-face and execute the standing ham-string stretch, thus mooning all of Plt 2. Good times.

Back to tonight. In an accountability formation you typically have the platoon hold up their weapons and count off from right to left, dropping to our knees as we go. 3^rd Plt has been working on our special addendum: we’ve incorporated a nifty rifle spin into it as we drop. Our DSs love it. Tonight all three platoons had to gather for company accountability in front of DS “D” of 2^nd Plt, and we had our chance to do our trick in front of everyone. And except for one minor slip0up where one of our guys stuttered on his number, we did very well. Ds “D” glared at us, obviously pissed, and declared: “Well, that was just retarded, 3^rd. And all you’ve done is prove that some of you don’t have the brains to count and move at the same time.” “Somebody’s jealous,’ I muttered. Then DS “D” turned to his platoon and ordered a weapons count, clearly expecting to set a new standard of perfection. They screwed it up in a hundred ways. As I write this, I can still hear him screaming at his platoon in the “privacy” of their Bay. Man, he hates us. Now we just have to win the Qualification competition tomorrow to seal the deal. On that note, our DSs are granting us an extra hour of sleep to give us a leg up. I’m going to take advantage of that now. Good night, team.

-Jeremy